Marriage Is Unnecessarily Overrated – Halima Abubakar On Her Love Life TrendyVoice

28 June 2016

Marriage Is Unnecessarily Overrated – Halima Abubakar On Her Love Life




Popular actress, Halima Abubakar
recently granted and interview to
Encomium where she talked about her
love life, career, life as a CEO and the
issue of marriage. Here are a few
excerpts on issues she touched on:

•On her recent stand on not
wanting to get into marriage

Yes, because marriage has been
overrated. It's unnecessarily over rated.
It's just too much of headache with how
things are now. Even ordinary
relationship is a huge burden, huge
headache and heartbreaking, let alone
marriage. When you can't stand each
other as boyfriend and girlfriend, how
would you live together under the same
roof when you get married?
People need to know themselves
seriously. When I say seriously, I mean
spiritually before getting married.

People only know themselves
physically, not spiritually, so they end
up getting bored with each other. And
they will say they don't want to get
divorce because of what society would
say after investing so much on the
marriage.

They stay in that marriage and later it
may become very irritating and they
start fighting. Before they know it,
everything becomes violent. You hear
people say all sorts of things. You're the
one who allowed people to get to you
and start telling you you're getting old.
You're the one allowing them to
convince you that you're getting old,
you need to get married. Everyone will
surely get old. Who won't get old? So,
when people say I am getting old, get
married, I would tell them that's the
only thing they know. People carry
marriage like a flag.

•How people talking about marriage
irritates her

Yes, it's very irritating. When you're not
my father nor my mother and you're
more concerned than them. So people
should face their problems. They also
have a lot of problems in their lives.
Why are they poke nosing into my life
and trying to make me take a drastic
decision I may regret tomorrow.

So you know if you push me to get
married and I end up probably not
loving my husband the way I am meant
to love him. I'm not saying Nigerians
are the cause but who is the fault?
Everybody would be like "I don't know
why they cannot keep marriage as if
they as individuals have kept their
marriages. Marriage these days is like a
glass that needs to be threaded with
care and a lot of attention. It's like a
school, you need to study very well. My
parents have been married for about 39
years. So when people say things they
don't know about me, I just look at
them and laugh. I really don't need to
say anything. Out of the fact that I am
fighting and creating awareness for
domestic violence and some other
things add up either frustration or
anger or pity for the woman who is late,
some people come on my page and
start insulting me because of my
personal decision or choice. I don't
know how it affects anyone.

•On her whether she plans to forgo
marriage completely

No, people should only try to be nice
about marriage to make me interested
in it. Don't tell me actresses don't stay
in marriage. Olu Jacobs and Joke Silva
have been married for long and they're
still in the marriage. nothing happened
to their union.

Omotola and her husband have been
married for long, they're still very much
together. She got married at a young
age which is good. What I am trying to
say is that going into marriage needs a
lot, you don't just go into it. My elder
sister got married at 26 and she's doing
fine in the marriage with her husband.

Now, tell me why won't I want a family
like that? But these days, people are
just too much into social media, that's
why marriages are crashing. Marriage
these days is not based on happiness
and genuine love. Let me ask, who is
that poor person that has married a
billionaire son? So, why won't marriage
crash when it's not based on happiness
and genuine love?

•The man in her life

At this time of my life, I am no longer
interested in talking about anything. If
there is or there's none, that's my
problem. It's nobody's business. I have
done that in the past. I have invested a
lot emotionally, talking about my
relationship.

So, I am no longer interested in talking
about my relationship. I am tired of
talking. Let's rest that case. Even on my
wedding day, if I decide to marry,
eventually, nobody is invited.




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